Sugaring has grown into a popular trend where young people (sugar babies) seek older people for companionship, money, gifts or travel arrangements. These relationships are referred to as “sugar dating” or “sugardaddy/mama.”
The popularity of sugaring has been fueled by media coverage that has portrayed the arrangement as romantic and glamorous. It has also been promoted by the websites Seeking Arrangement and What’s Your Price, which specialize in pairing wealthy older men with younger women seeking an upscale lifestyle.
Many college students get involved in sugaring to pay for tuition, books and living expenses. Some also use it as a way to make extra cash to save for future endeavors, while others just enjoy the perks of being in a relationship with an older, richer man or woman.
While sex isn’t always a part of the relationship, many sugar daddies and mommas do have sexual interests. Those more interested in companionship often pay their sugar babies a monthly allowance, while those who are more interested in sex gift them on a date-by-date basis.
It’s important for a sugar baby to set their expectations up front and be clear about what they want from the relationship. It’s also helpful to be aware of common red flags, such as a sugar daddy/mama who says they don’t want anything transactional or asks you to come over to their house on the first date.
Some sugar daddy/mamas may take advantage of their position of power by coercing sex that the sugar baby doesn’t necessarily want to engage in. This is known as exploitation and can be particularly dangerous when the sex is performed in private, such as at a hotel room or in a sugar daddy’s home. Some sugar babies have even reported being paid for sex that they didn’t consent to or feel pressured to perform.
While the majority of sugar baby/sugar daddy relationships are mutually beneficial, it’s still important for both parties to be careful. Sugar babies should never agree to have sex with a stranger and should always meet in public places for the first few dates. It’s also a good idea to have a trusted friend present for the first meeting.
Sugar babies should also avoid giving out their real phone number until they’ve established a comfort level with their potential benefactor. Instead, they should use a Google voice or alias number and Facetime or Skype their potential sugar daddy/mama to establish a connection before meeting them in person.
If a sugar daddy/mama isn’t treating their sugar baby fairly, they should report them to the website that they work with. It’s also a good idea for a sugar baby to keep their sugar daddy’s name and address secret so that they don’t become the victim of a “pump and dump.” This is when a sugar daddy/mama stops paying an allowance or PPM, becomes intimate with the sugar baby and then ghosts them. This is a common occurrence in the community, so sugar babies should be wary of anyone who appears suspicious or untrustworthy.